Wednesday, December 19, 2012

The wait is killing me.

I rarely have no words, but regarding our transfer it just doesn't feel that awesome writing about being hopeful and all that jazz on a day of such horror.  It's like September 11th, everyone will remember where they were that day, but I was in stirrups wishing for what had just been taken from those families.  I simply can not even begin to imagine their pain.

And with that...

This freaking wait is killing me.  I will say this.. cycling over the holidays is pretty amazing.  There is all of this stuff to keep busy.  To prevent me from googling if sneezing is in fact a pregnancy symptom.  It doesn't change the fact that I want it to be over, but it does make the time pass a little bit easier having so much other stuff to do.  

People say, I just have a feeling this is going to work.  Well they had that feeling the last two times too, and we all know how that played out.  So your track record is crap!  ;)  I get asked a lot how I feel.  I feel like a normal person.  There's nothing that I feel that couldn't be chalked up to the super dose of hormones.  If this were under normal circumstances... I feel exactly the same way anyone else would feel a week after ovulation.  NOTHING. Trust me, I wish there was a baby kicking... but it simply does not work that way.

Im pretty sure this worked.  We will have triplets.  We will never have to deal with this ever again.  Two girls one boy.  We will happily ever after (more lies as I try to trick myself into a pregnancy).

*Also add 90210 to the list of shows that are covering infertility topics where you least expect it (yes... I watch 90210, I told you I watch a lot of bad tv).

14 comments:

  1. I hope you continue to find a number of distractions before you can test!

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  2. Distractions are fantastic! Wishing you the absolute best of luck with this cycle. May you start vomiting like you're in The Exorcist and your boobs feel like someone punched you thirty times (and you know I mean that in the nice way!)

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  3. What if you get two boys and a girl? Will you be all disappointed and fertile-esque? We will have to hunt you down and punch you then.

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    1. Lol! I'd be happy with anything, but I have a major confession to make... Little baby boys with their creepy wieners/balls creep me the hell out! I'm sure that's something you get over. It's a real fear... Like how some people are scared of spiders.

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    2. Ha ha, I wonder what that phobia would be called? miniwilly'n'nackersaphobia.

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    3. Lol.. Should I end up pregnant, we need to have a contest titled "name that phobia"

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  4. Crossing my fingers for you!

    P.S. Triplets would be lots of fun! :)

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  5. I hated the same thing - that people would say "I think it worked" when they said it EVERY time before! Do they think it helps? I'm not sure if it does. Maybe the first time but when it doesn't the first time it's really hard to hear after that.

    Fingers crossed for you!

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  6. When they say "I just have a feeling this time worked" I hear "I really hope it worked because I don't know what the crap to say to you anymore if it didn't".

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Your comments make me happy. They also make me feel like I'm
not talking to myself, which is critical for my sanity :)